Jokes

[Chubs_323]

Let's start a joke chain!
Rules: Before you write your own joke, you must rate the last person's joke. 1- bad , 5- very funny

Here we go (this isn't very good):

Q: Why did the blond nurse carry around a red pen?
A: To draw blood!

[JAKE_THE_SNAKE]

HAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THATS FUNNY BECAUSE BLONDES ARE DUMB!!!!!!!!!!!!! 5

[RealBronco]

hahahaha...yeah that one's awesome...5

okay um....

So this brunette drives by this wheat field and notices that there's a blonde girl out in the middle of it trying to swim. so she pulls over and yells out the window: "YOU IDIOT! IF I COULD SWIM I'D COME OUT THERE AND KICK YOUR ASS!"

[2 Minute Warning]

That's cute........I give it a 5:)



Do you know why Blonde jokes are so short?

So Brunettes can understand them.

[Broncofan-13]

Lol That was good... 5

There's this island about 20 miles from the nearest coast. 3 woman are stranded on it, a brunette, a blonde and a redhead. The brunette finally decides to try and swim to shore. She begins swimming, but after 6 or 7 miles, she becomes exhausted, and drowns. The redhead decides to try, swims about 12 miles, but becomes exhausted, and drowns also. then the blonde decides to try it, at around 17miles, she begins to feel fatigued, so she swims back to the island to rest.

[Chubs_323]

thats's good, 5

okay, so there is this magic mirror in this old house that makes you disappear when you tell a lie while looking into it.

So, a brunette goes up to it and says, "I'm the most beutiful girl in the world!" and "POOF" she disappears.

Next, a redhead goes up to the mirror and says, "I'm the smartest girl in the world!" and "POOF" she disappears.

Finally, a blonde goes up to the mirror and says, "I think..." and "POOF" she disappears.
:)

[Jared]

AAAAAAAHHHHHH S**T that was funny. I wasn't expecting that.

cinco (that's a 5)

This from my wife, a natural blonde:

What do you call a smart blonde?

A golden retriever!

[2 Minute Warning]

That is clever.......I give it a 5:) Ok this isn't really a joke.....but here goes

The European Union has just announced an agreement
whereby English will be the official language of the
European Union rather than German, which was the one
other possibility.

As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's
Government has conceded that English spelling does
actually have some small, but significant, room for
improvement and has thus accepted a 5-year
phase-in-plan of these improvements that will
eventually become known as "Euro English".

In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c".
Sertainly this will make the sivil servants jump
with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of
"k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards
kan have one letter less.


In the sekond year, there will be growing publik
enthusiasm when the troublesome "ph" will be
replaced with "f". This will make words like
fotograf 20 persent shorter.

In the third year, publik akseptanse of the new
spelling kan be expected to reach the stage where
more komplikated changes are possible.

Governments will enkourage the removal of double
letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate
speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of

the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it
should go away.

By the fourth year, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps
such as replasing "th"
with "z", and "w" with "v".

During the fifz year, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd
from vords containing "ou" and after ziz fifz yer,
ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no
mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi
tu understand ech oza.

Ze drem of a United Urop vil finali kum tru. If zis
mad u smil ples pas on to oza pepl.

Zen ve vil rul ze vorld!!!!

[2 Minute Warning]

OK I get the hint.......nobody liked it. :(
Now it's someone elses turn:)

[Chubs_323]

I just didn't read the whole thing. :)

So, a bunch of blondes get together for a convention to prove to the world that blondes aren't dumb. So, this guy asks for a blond to step up on stage. One comes up. He asks her, "What color is the sky?" The blonde replies, "Uh... Red!" Then the guy says, "No, I'm sorry, that's wrong." All the blonds start chanting, "Give her another chance, give her another chance!" "Okay, we'll give her another chance. What color is orange juice?" The blonde replies, "Uh... Green!" "Nope" says the guy. "Give her another chance! Cive her another chance!" "Okay, one more chance. What is 1+1? The blonde thinks for a while. Then she says, "Uh, 2?" The blonds start chanting, "Give her another chance, give her another chance!"

[bronco4life]

Maria just got married, and being a traditional
> > Italian, she was still a virgin.
> >
> >
> > So, on her wedding night, staying at her mother's
> > house, she was nervous. Her mother reassured her,
> > "Don't worry, Maria. Tony's a good man. Go
> > upstairs, and he'll take care of you!" So up the
> > stairs she went.
> >
> > When she got upstairs, Tony took off his shirt
> > and exposed his hairy chest. Maria ran downstairs
> > to her mother and said, "Mama, mama, Tony's got a
> > big, muscular, hairy chest." "Don't worry, Maria."
> > said her mother. "All good men have muscular and
> > hairy chests. Go upstairs. He'll take care of you!"
> >
> > So up she went again. When she got there, Tony took
> > off his pants, exposing his hairy legs. Again Maria
> > ran downstairs to her mother. "Mama, Mama, Tony
> > took off his pants, and he's got hairy legs!" Her
> > mother replied, "Don't worry, Maria. All good men
> > have hairy legs. Tony's a good man. Go upstairs,
> > and he'll take care of you." So up she went again.
> > When she got there, Tony took off his socks, and
> > on his left foot he was missing three toes. When
> > Maria saw this, she ran downstairs. "Mama, Mama,
> > Tony's got a foot and a half!"
> >
> >
> > "Stay here and stir the pasta," said the mother.
> > "This is a job for Mama!"

[bronco4life]

He picks the dog up and starts swinging it around his head.

Alarmed, a shop assistant calls out:

'Can I help, sir?'

'No thanks,' says the blind bloke. 'Just looking.'

[bronco4life]

A mate of mine drowned in a bowl of muesli

he was pulled in by a strong currant!!!!

[bronco4life]

It is the opening debate of the 2001 World Women's Conference on the subject of female assertiveness.

The first speaker, from Canada, stood up. "At last year's conference we spoke about being more assertive with our husbands. Well, after the conference I went home and told my husband that I would no longer cook for him, and that he would have to do it himself. After the first day I saw nothing. After the second day I still saw nothing. But after the third day I saw that he had cooked a wonderful roast lamb."

The crowd applauded.

The second speaker, from France, stood up. "After last year's conference I went home and told my husband that I would no longer do his laundry and that he would have to do it himself. After the first day I saw nothing. After the second day I saw nothing. But after the third day I saw that he had done not only his own washing, but my washing as well."

The crowd cheered.

The third speaker, from Glasgow, stood up. "After last year's conference ah went hame and tellt ma man that I widnae dae his cookin', cleanin' or shoppin' and that he wid haftae dae it hissel. Efter the first day ah saw nuhin. Efter the second day ah saw nuhin. But after the third day I could jist see a wee bit oot o ma left eye!!"

[bronco4life]

There's a bus full of ugly people driving along, and it crashes into a truck, killing everyone on board.
As they were queueing at the pearly gates, God whispers to St Peter to
grant them all just one wish, they've had a hard enough life being ugly, it
was a bit unfair to crash their bus, it's the least he can do for them.
So St Peter starts letting them through, granting wishes as they go.
The first says to him "I want to be gorgeous!", and sure enough, her wish
was granted.
The next says "Make me the best looking person in heaven" and again, the
wish was granted.
Everyone's wishes were much the same, all wishing not to be ugly anymore,
but as their wishes were granted, the guy at the back was rolling around on
the floor in fits of laughter.
St Peter continued to grant everyone's wishes, until he came to the last
guy.
"What's so funny?" St Peter asked, to which the guy replied...

"Make 'em all ugly again"

[michbroncofan]

A wife finally decides she is fed up with serving her husband. One day, he asks her to wash his sweatshirt for her. She tells him if he wants it washed, he can do it himself. So, off to the laundry room he goes. Standing over the washing machine, he finally calls to his wife, "Honey, what setting do I use?" She replies "What does it say on your sweatshirt?"

His response: "Kansas City Chiefs".

[2 Minute Warning]

A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting! Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled, "PULL OVER!"
"NO!", the blonde yelled back, "IT'S A SCARF!"

[2 Minute Warning]

No I am not a sado!!! it just made me smile !!!

Are you tired of all those sissy, mushy "friendship" poems that always sound good but never actually come close to reality? Well, here is a series of promises that really speaks to true friendship!

1. When you are sad, ...I will get you drunk and will help you plot revenge against the sorry moron who made you sad.

2. When you are blue, ...I'll try to dislodge whatever is choking you.
3. When you smile, ....I'll know your team finally won.

4. When you are scared, ...I will rag you about it every chance I get.

5. When you are worried, ...I will tell you horrible stories about how
much worse it could be and to quit whining.

6. When you are confused, ...I will use little words to explain.

7. When you are sick, ...stay away from me until you're well again. I don't want whatever you have.

8. When you fall, ...I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass.

This is my oath, I pledge 'til the end. Why you may ask?


Because you're my friend!

Send this to ten of your closest friends and get depressed because you can only think of two, and one of them is not speaking to you right now anyway.

;)

[BroncoMadness]

Ok, there are 3 dogs in the waiting room of a vet's office. A Poodle, A Schnauzer and A Great Dane.
The Poodle turns to the Schnauzer and asks,
"Why are you here?" The Schnauzer responds,
"I'm 17 years old. I don't see or hear very well. I've been having accidents in the house. My owner says I'm too old and sick so he brought me here to be put to sleep." The Schnauzer asks the poodle, "Why are you here?"
The Poodle responds, "I've not been myself lately. I've been especially high strung. I've been barking all the time, and I've been snapping at people . My owner says he can't risk me biting somebody so he brought me here to be put to sleep."
The Poodle and Schnauzer ask the Great Dane why he is here.
The Great Dane responds,
"My owner is this beautiful runway model. Yesterday she was walking around the house naked when she suddenly bent down to pick up something she dropped. She was bent over and naked when nature took over and the next thing I know I'm on top of her doing the doggie thing. I couldn't help myself. " The Poodle asks, "So your owner brought you here to be put to sleep?" The Great Dane says, "No, I'm just here to get my nails trimmed."

[BroncoMadness]

The varsity girls track team coach just couldn't seem to win a meet. Six losses in a row! He decided it would be best if he put his girls on anabolic steroids. Soon his girls were performing like stars. They went undefeated for the rest of the year. They won States and were on their way to Nationals. On the bus trip, Sally, the star sprinter struck up a conversation with the coach...
Sally: "Coach, I have a problem!"

Coach: "What's that Sally?"

Sally: "I'm developing thick hair on my body!"

Coach: "What part of your body?"

Sally: "My chest coach."

Coach: "How far does the hair go down Sally?"

Sally: "Well coach, it goes clear down to my balls, which is another thing I wanted to speak with you about!!!"

[BroncoMadness]

Three football fans were on their way to a game when one noticed a foot sticking out of the bushes by the side of the road. They stopped and discovered a nude female dead drunk.
Out of respect and propriety, the Bronco's fan took off his cap and placed it over her right breast.

The 'Niners' fan took off his cap and placed it over her left breast.

Following their lead, the Raider's fan took off his cap and placed it over her crotch.

The police were called and when the officer arrived, he conducted his inspection. First, he lifted up the Bronco's cap, replaced it and wrote down some notes.

Next, he lifted the 'Niners' cap, replaced it and wrote down some more notes.

The officer then lifted the Raider's cap, replaced it, then lifted it again, replaced it, lifted it a third time, and replaced it one last time.

The Raider's fan was getting upset and finally asked, "What are you, a pervert or something?""Why do you keep lifting and looking, lifting and looking?
"Well," said the officer. "I am simply surprised; normally when I look under a Raider's hat,
I find an A_ _hole"

[BroncoMadness]

I just remembered one more:
A man was out, driving happily along in his car late one Saturday night. Before too long, a cop pulled him over.
The policeman walked up to the man and asked, "Have you been drinking, sir?"

"Why? Was I weaving all over the road?"

"No," replied the policeman, "you were driving splendidly. It was the really ugly girl in the passenger seat that gave you away."

[Jared]

Originally posted by BroncoMadness
I just remembered one more:
A man was out, driving happily along in his car late one Saturday night. Before too long, a cop pulled him over.
The policeman walked up to the man and asked, "Have you been drinking, sir?"

"Why? Was I weaving all over the road?"

"No," replied the policeman, "you were driving splendidly. It was the really ugly girl in the passenger seat that gave you away."



HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA :-)

[ScottishBronco]

How do you circumcise a Raiders fan?

Kick his sister in the jaw!!!

BOOM BOOM!!

[BroncoMadness]

A man won a ticket to the Super Bowl, but when he got there, he was very disappointed. He was on the far left, at the back. He was closer to the Goodyear Blimp than he was to the field, but halfway through the first quarter he spotted the best seat in the house. He went over to the empty seat and said to the guy sitting beside it, "Is anyone sitting here?" "No.", the guy replied. So the man sat down, and about 30 minutes later, he couldn't resist saying, "Man! This is an awesome seat! Whoever gave it up must be CRAZY!" The guy sitting next to him replied, "Well, actually, that was supposed to be my wife's seat, but she died." The man, feeling like **** said, "Oh, that's awful, but couldn't you have asked a relative to come with you?" "No", said the guy. The man was confused, and asked, "Why not?" The guy replied, "Because they're all at the funeral."

[BroncoMadness]

An old man and his wife have gone to bed. After laying there a few minutes the old man farts and says, "Seven Points."
His wife rolls over and says, "What in the world was that?"

The old man replied, "It's fart football."

A few minutes later the wife lets one go and says, "Touchdown, tie score."

After about five minutes the old man farts again and says, "Touchdown, I'm ahead 14 to 7."

Not to be out done the wife rips another one and says, "Touchdown, tie score."

Five seconds go by and she lets out a squeaker and says, "Field goal, I lead 17 to 14."

Now the pressure's on and the old man refuses to get beat by a woman so he strains real hard but to no availability. Realizing a defeat is totally unacceptable, he gives it everything he has, but instead of farting, he poops in the bed.

The wife looks and says, "What the hell was that?"

The old man replied, "Half-time, Switch sides."

[2 Minute Warning]

A woman walked into the kitchen to find her husband stalking around with a fly swatter.

"What are you doing?" She asked.

"Hunting Flies" He responded.

"Oh. Killing any?" She asked.

"Yep, 3 males, 2 Females," he replied.


Intrigued, she asked. "How can you tell?"

He responded, "3 were on a beer can, 2 were on the phone."




--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

[Ftblman]

THAT WAS ..OK...3



One day this guy is sitting on his front porch..He noticed his blonde nieghbor walking out to her mailbox and then slamming it shut...So after the 5th time of doing this he finally asks her "why do you keep looking in the mailbox and slamming it ?".She replies"My stupid computer keeps telling me i got mail"

[Misti]

A very old couple who have been married forever are sitting
on the Porch one night. Suddenly, the old woman reaches over and smacks
her husband, knocking him off the porch and into the bushes. He crawls back
up and asks, "What was that for?" She says, "For having a little pec ker."


He sits there quietly a moment, then smacks her, sending her off the other
side of the porch and into the bushes. She crawls back and says, "What was
that for?" He says, "For knowing there was more than one size!"

[Broncofan-13]

Originally posted by ScottishBronco
How do you circumcise a Raiders fan?

Kick his sister in the jaw!!!

BOOM BOOM!!

LMAO, that was good. 5

what does the TGIF on a blondes shoe stand for?
........ Toes Go In First

[2 Minute Warning]

TGIF:) a 4;)

A plane is on its way to Montreal when a blonde
in Economy Class gets up and moves to the First
Class section and sits down.The flight attendant
watches her do this and asks to see her ticket.
She then tells the blonde that she paid for
Economy and that she will have to sit in the back.
The blonde replies "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful,
I'm going to Montreal and I'm staying right here!".
The flight attendant goes into the ****pit and
tells the pilot and copilot that there is some blonde
bimbo sitting in First Class that belongs in Economy
and won't move back to her seat. The copilot goes
back to the explain that because she only paid for
Economy she will have to leave and return to her seat.
The blonde replies, "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm
going to Montreal and I'm staying right here!"
The copilot tells the pilot that he probably should have
the police waiting when they land to arrest
this blonde woman that won't listen to reason. The
pilot says "I'll handle this. I'm married to a blonde.
I have learned to speak 'blonde'". He goes back to the
blonde, whispers in her ear,and without hesitation, she
gets up and moves back to her seat in the Economy
section.The flight attendant and copilot are amazed and
asked him what he said to make her move without
any fuss.
"I told her First Class isn't going to Montreal."

[thesaint]

Tom calls in to work and says " Hey Boss, I cant make it in to work today. I've got a terrible headache and my stomach is really hurting. I just cant make it.

The Boss tells him "Tom, I really need you here today. You've got to find a way to feel better. When I feel like that I just have sex with my wife. Im not sure why, but it always seems to make me feel better and I'm able to make it to work. You should try that."

Two hours later Tom calls back "Boss, I did what you said and you were right. I feel great, I'll be at work soon! Oh and by the way Boss, you have a nice house."

[Broncofan-13]

LOL 5


two jokes for you


Q: what job do blondes have at an M&M factory?

A: proofreading


Q: how do blonde brain cells die?

A: alone

[brnc fan 14]

a broncos fan, a buccs fan, and a kc fan are driving in a car together. they are speeding and get pulled over by the cops. the cop is a female, so the brnc fan says, "please let us go, this is my dads car and he will kill me!" the cop smirks and says "ok, ill measure your ****s and if they add up to 20 inches, you can go." so the denver fan shows his, and its 10 inches. the buccs fan shows his, and its 9 inches. the kc fan shows his and its 1 inch. the cop lets them go and on the way home, the denver fan says, "your lucky i have a 10 inch ****." the buccs fan says "your lucky i have a 9 inch ****." the kc fan says, "your lucky i have a boner!"

[broncos0707]

Bronco Vs Raiders

On a tour California, the Pope took a couple of days off to visit the coast for some sightseeing. He was cruising along the beach in the Pope-Mobile when there was a frantic commotion just off shore. A helpless man, wearing a Black&Silver RAIDER'S jersey, was struggling frantically to free himself from the jaws of a 25-foot shark. As the Pope watched, horrified, a speedboat came
racing up with three men wearing Denver Broncos jerseys. One quickly fired a harpoon into the sharks' side. The other two reached out and pulled the bleeding, semiconscious Raider fan from the water. Then using long clubs, the three beat the shark to death and hauled it, too, into the boat.

Immediately, the Pope shouted and summoned them to the beach. "I give you my blessing for your brave actions," he said. "I have been told about there being bad blood between Broncos and Raiders but now I have seen with my own eyes that this is not true."

As the Pope drove off, the harpooner asked his buddies "Who was that?"

"It was the Pope", one replied. "He is in direct contact with God and has
access to all of God's wisdom."

"Well," the harpooner said, "he may have access to God's wisdom, but he doesn't know jack about shark fishing. Is the bait holding up O.K., or do we need to get another one?"

[dandaman23]

One day there was an old man sitting on his porch when a kid about 15 walked by. The kid had duct tape, the old man asked hey there what are you going to do with that duct tape the boy said im goin to go get me some ducks the old man then said you cant get no ducks with duct tape. A few hours later the boy came back with a duck. The next day the boy walked by with some chicken wire the old man asked what are you goin to do with that chicken wire the boy replies well im goin to get me some chickens the old man says you cant get no chickens with chicken wire sure enough a few hours later he walks by with a chicken. The next day the boy went by with some ***** willow the old man looked at the boy and said I am coming with you!!!

[neisha26]

Originally posted by Chubs_323
thats's good, 5

okay, so there is this magic mirror in this old house that makes you disappear when you tell a lie while looking into it.

So, a brunette goes up to it and says, "I'm the most beutiful girl in the world!" and "POOF" she disappears.

Next, a redhead goes up to the mirror and says, "I'm the smartest girl in the world!" and "POOF" she disappears.

Finally, a blonde goes up to the mirror and says, "I think..." and "POOF" she disappears.
:) i liked that :p

[neisha26]

Originally posted by JoviBronco
TGIF:) a 4;)

A plane is on its way to Montreal when a blonde
in Economy Class gets up and moves to the First
Class section and sits down.The flight attendant
watches her do this and asks to see her ticket.
She then tells the blonde that she paid for
Economy and that she will have to sit in the back.
The blonde replies "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful,
I'm going to Montreal and I'm staying right here!".
The flight attendant goes into the ****pit and
tells the pilot and copilot that there is some blonde
bimbo sitting in First Class that belongs in Economy
and won't move back to her seat. The copilot goes
back to the explain that because she only paid for
Economy she will have to leave and return to her seat.
The blonde replies, "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm
going to Montreal and I'm staying right here!"
The copilot tells the pilot that he probably should have
the police waiting when they land to arrest
this blonde woman that won't listen to reason. The
pilot says "I'll handle this. I'm married to a blonde.
I have learned to speak 'blonde'". He goes back to the
blonde, whispers in her ear,and without hesitation, she
gets up and moves back to her seat in the Economy
section.The flight attendant and copilot are amazed and
asked him what he said to make her move without
any fuss.
"I told her First Class isn't going to Montreal." now that's what you call funny i'll give that a 5

[neisha26]

Originally posted by thesaint
Tom calls in to work and says " Hey Boss, I cant make it in to work today. I've got a terrible headache and my stomach is really hurting. I just cant make it.

The Boss tells him "Tom, I really need you here today. You've got to find a way to feel better. When I feel like that I just have sex with my wife. Im not sure why, but it always seems to make me feel better and I'm able to make it to work. You should try that."

Two hours later Tom calls back "Boss, I did what you said and you were right. I feel great, I'll be at work soon! Oh and by the way Boss, you have a nice house." now this had me shocked i'll give this a 10 on ascale of 5 their isn't a such thing so i give this a 10. 5 is degrading to this joke.:D

[neisha26]

Originally posted by BroncoMadness
Three football fans were on their way to a game when one noticed a foot sticking out of the bushes by the side of the road. They stopped and discovered a nude female dead drunk.
Out of respect and propriety, the Bronco's fan took off his cap and placed it over her right breast.

The 'Niners' fan took off his cap and placed it over her left breast.

Following their lead, the Raider's fan took off his cap and placed it over her crotch.

The police were called and when the officer arrived, he conducted his inspection. First, he lifted up the Bronco's cap, replaced it and wrote down some notes.

Next, he lifted the 'Niners' cap, replaced it and wrote down some more notes.

The officer then lifted the Raider's cap, replaced it, then lifted it again, replaced it, lifted it a third time, and replaced it one last time.

The Raider's fan was getting upset and finally asked, "What are you, a pervert or something?""Why do you keep lifting and looking, lifting and looking?
"Well," said the officer. "I am simply surprised; normally when I look under a Raider's hat,
I find an A_ _hole" i give u a 5

[neisha26]

Originally posted by BroncoMadness
A man won a ticket to the Super Bowl, but when he got there, he was very disappointed. He was on the far left, at the back. He was closer to the Goodyear Blimp than he was to the field, but halfway through the first quarter he spotted the best seat in the house. He went over to the empty seat and said to the guy sitting beside it, "Is anyone sitting here?" "No.", the guy replied. So the man sat down, and about 30 minutes later, he couldn't resist saying, "Man! This is an awesome seat! Whoever gave it up must be CRAZY!" The guy sitting next to him replied, "Well, actually, that was supposed to be my wife's seat, but she died." The man, feeling like **** said, "Oh, that's awful, but couldn't you have asked a relative to come with you?" "No", said the guy. The man was confused, and asked, "Why not?" The guy replied, "Because they're all at the funeral." you are dead wrong for that joke it was real funny i give u a 5 too.

[neisha26]

Originally posted by ScottishBronco
How do you circumcise a Raiders fan?

Kick his sister in the jaw!!!

BOOM BOOM!! that's not funny at all you get a 0 for that.

[neisha26]

Originally posted by Ftblman
THAT WAS ..OK...3



One day this guy is sitting on his front porch..He noticed his blonde nieghbor walking out to her mailbox and then slamming it shut...So after the 5th time of doing this he finally asks her "why do you keep looking in the mailbox and slamming it ?".She replies"My stupid computer keeps telling me i got mail" that sounds just like a blond