The Truely One Thing Women Want To Hear From There Significant Other

[TXBRONC]

It was my fault, my own fault, my own most grievous fault. :D

[Jaws]

Music to a females ears.

You must make more posts like this TX ;)

[His Wife]

*giggle*

You forgot to add..."And how can I make it up to you?" :laugh:

[TXBRONC]

*giggle*

You forgot to add..."And how can I make it up to you?" :laugh:

What do you mean? It has been my experience that there is no way to do that short accept to take my punsihment like a man for as long as she is upset. :laugh:

[The Dark Knight]

Maybe that's why I'm single.

:brick:

[TXBRONC]

Maybe that's why I'm single.

:brick:

You'll probably have longer life span that way. :D

[His Wife]

What do you mean? It has been my experience that there is no way to do that short accept to take my punsihment like a man for as long as she is upset. :laugh:


I just think it's a "little" sexy when men 'pout', don't you?

[The Dark Knight]

You'll probably have longer life span that way. :D


Actually, I heard single men die quicker because they don't take care of themselves.

[TXBRONC]

I just think it's a "little" sexy when men 'pout', don't you?

I don't think can answer this since I'm a man.

[TXBRONC]

Actually, I heard single men die quicker because they don't take care of themselves.

Married men generally don't do a very good job either.

[The Dark Knight]

I don't think can answer this since I'm a man.


I think she's talking about Tom Brady last week.

He was pouting alot and I heard the ladies love him.

[His Wife]

I don't think can answer this since I'm a man.

Better safe than sorry on that one! ;)

But still, "I" think it's absolutely adorable.

However, when women pout...it's not so pretty, but you are qualified to answer that one far more than I. :D

[TXBRONC]

I think she's talking about Tom Brady last week.

He was pouting alot and I heard the ladies love him.


Ok, but I say he looked sexy doing that, it would give off the wrong vibe.

[The Dark Knight]

Better safe than sorry on that one! ;)

But still, "I" think it's absolutely adorable.

However, when women pout...it's not so pretty, but you are qualified to answer that one far more than I. :D


It depends on the pouter.

[anton...]

they are the words that make me pout in fear...

:ugh:

[His Wife]

I think she's talking about Tom Brady last week.

He was pouting alot and I heard the ladies love him.


No...I was referring to my husband, but he doesn't own the market on pouting I'm sure. Ladies like a little pouting, just a little. Otherwise...the pouting goes into a childlike mode (and I don't want to feel like my husbands mother-yuck).
But yes...a "little pouting" can be quite sexy!

Have you really heard that single men die sooner? If that is so, I would think it's because they 1) Are not getting any relief (if you know what I mean) or 2) they don't have anyone to argue with! :laugh:

[anton...]

No...I was referring to my husband, but he doesn't own the market on pouting I'm sure. Ladies like a little pouting, just a little. Otherwise...the pouting goes into a childlike mode (and I don't want to feel like my husbands mother-yuck).
But yes...a "little pouting" can be quite sexy!

Have you really heard that single men die sooner? If that is so, I would think it's because they 1) Are not getting any relief (if you know what I mean) or 2) they don't have anyone to argue with! :laugh:

i dont know what you mean...

:confused:

[The Dark Knight]

No...I was referring to my husband, but he doesn't own the market on pouting I'm sure. Ladies like a little pouting, just a little. Otherwise...the pouting goes into a childlike mode (and I don't want to feel like my husbands mother-yuck).
But yes...a "little pouting" can be quite sexy!

Have you really heard that single men die sooner? If that is so, I would think it's because they 1) Are not getting any relief (if you know what I mean) or 2) they don't have anyone to argue with! :laugh:


Yeah, generally single men die pretty quick.

Eating fast food everyday, not going to the doc, drinking lots of beer, ect ect.

Single men relieve themselves, so I don't think that's an issue.

[His Wife]

Yeah, generally single men die pretty quick.

Eating fast food everyday, not going to the doc, drinking lots of beer, ect ect.

Single men relieve themselves, so I don't think that's an issue.


:eek: :laugh: :laugh:

You are too funny!

[BroncFanInPA]

Actually, I heard single men die quicker because they don't take care of themselves.

You do know why men die before their women, don't you?











Because they want to :D

[anton...]

Yeah, generally single men die pretty quick.

Eating fast food everyday, not going to the doc, drinking lots of beer, ect ect.

Single men relieve themselves, so I don't think that's an issue.

once a day keeps the prostate cancer away...

:salute:

[anton...]

yes...

they even taught us that at school...

:salute:

[Jaws]

yes...

they even taught us that at school...

:salute:

..theory, not practical I hope! :eek:

[anton...]

..theory, not practical I hope! :eek:

so do i....

:ugh:

[His Wife]

You do know why men die before their women, don't you?


Because they want to :D


Well...you know what makes a good marriage of 50 years don't you?.......


On your 25th wedding anniversary you take your wife to Hawaii and

on your 50th anniversary....you pick her up!

[Jaws]

Well...you know what makes a good marriage of 50 years don't you?.......


On your 25th wedding anniversary you take your wife to Hawaii and

on your 50th anniversary....you pick her up!

:laugh: :laugh:

If you are able to find such a man, and he is single, send him my way! :beer:

[anton...]

Well...you know what makes a good marriage of 50 years don't you?.......


On your 25th wedding anniversary you take your wife to Hawaii and

on your 50th anniversary....you pick her up!

:laugh:

LMAO!!!

...

*picks himself up and off the floor...*

valid point...

:coffee:

[TXBRONC]

Well...you know what makes a good marriage of 50 years don't you?.......


On your 25th wedding anniversary you take your wife to Hawaii and

on your 50th anniversary....you pick her up!


As long as the kids are with her that's fine.

[BroncFanInPA]

Well...you know what makes a good marriage of 50 years don't you?.......


On your 25th wedding anniversary you take your wife to Hawaii and

on your 50th anniversary....you pick her up!
LOL!

Ok, you asked for it... :D

An oldie but goodie (http://www.tech-sol.net/humor/one-liner164.htm)

[NJBRONCOSFAN]

It was my fault, my own fault, my own most grievious fault. :D
Haha..before opening this thread up, i figured it was 'You were right', so i was kinda close! :D

[Missin#7]

You do know why men die before their women, don't you?











Because they want to :D

:laugh:


Don't think we don't wish it on you guys some days either! :D

[Nick]

I know it is not I love you. So I would have to agree with saying somthing is your fault or somthing with her spending money. Other then that you got me :goofy:

[Jared]

Married men generally don't do a very good job either.


Speak for yourself.

[His Wife]

I know it is not I love you. So I would have to agree with saying somthing is your fault or somthing with her spending money. Other then that you got me :goofy:

"I love you" should be used in a strategic way with your spouse.

You can use "I love you" at initial sign of anger from wife, but you can not continue to use "I love you" on everything you do wrong or wife gets more angry.
*growl*

Well, maybe you fellas you take this quiz to see if you even have the right IQ for dating, let alone being married. ;)

First Date IQ Quiz or Are You Fit to be a Husband Quiz, either way...it works! (http://www.links2love.com/quizzes/perfect_first_date_quiz.htm)

[TXBRONC]

Speak for yourself.


I'm pretty sure its accurated men in general don't take good care of themselves including married men. Btw I don't fall in that category I've family to think about so I want do my best to stay healthy.

[His Wife]

LOL!

Ok, you asked for it... :D

An oldie but goodie (http://www.tech-sol.net/humor/one-liner164.htm)Red Skelton's Tips For A Happy Marriage


3. I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back.

My favorite. I miss Red Skelton.

[The Dark Knight]

"I love you" should be used in a strategic way with your spouse.

You can use "I love you" at initial sign of anger from wife, but you can not continue to use "I love you" on everything you do wrong or wife gets more angry.
*growl*

Well, maybe you fellas you take this quiz to see if you even have the right IQ for dating, let alone being married. ;)

First Date IQ Quiz or Are You Fit to be a Husband Quiz, either way...it works! (http://www.links2love.com/quizzes/perfect_first_date_quiz.htm)


Your score is: 27 (21-29 points) Your First Date IQ is HIGH - but you need to brush up a little on your interpersonal skills. Remember to think about the other person and increase your sensitivity to others' needs. Keep the old adage 'do unto other' in mind and you'll be fine on your first date.


Hmmm, OK. I'm a pretty good first date I think but I hardly ever get to the second date.

[Fred the Bunny]

Screw all that!


What I want to hear from my guy.

1. The game's on.
2. I did the dishes
3. Pizza's on it's way.
4. The booze is cold


OH! And "honey, my shlong grew like 6 more inches last night & I somehow know what a g spot is"

That's it. I'm easy to please.

[anton...]

Screw all that!


What I want to hear from my guy.

1. The game's on.
2. I did the dishes
3. Pizza's on it's way.
4. The booze is cold


OH! And "honey, my shlong grew like 6 more inches last night & I somehow know what a g spot is"

That's it. I'm easy to please.

small ey???

:ugh:

[The Dark Knight]

Screw all that!


What I want to hear from my guy.

1. The game's on.
2. I did the dishes
3. Pizza's on it's way.
4. The booze is cold


OH! And "honey, my shlong grew like 6 more inches last night & I somehow know what a g spot is"

That's it. I'm easy to please.


You sound like a reasonable woman.

I just wish my date wouldn't deflate before I'm finished.

[Fred the Bunny]

You sound like a reasonable woman.

I just wish my date wouldn't deflate before I'm finished.


They make those "real dolls" now.
Just like real chicks, make noise and everything.
Saw it on HBO (not that sex shop you didn't see me coming out of the other day)
Real hair & other real, jiggly parts and such. I'd find it for you, but I can't post it here. I'd get into trouble. Jared would freak out on me.

[Eldritch]

They make those "real dolls" now.
Just like real chicks, make noise and everything.
Saw it on HBO (not that sex shop you didn't see me coming out of the other day)
Real hair & other real, jiggly parts and such. I'd find it for you, but I can't post it here. I'd get into trouble. Jared would freak out on me.

I SAW that!! I don't get HBO and I think I was at someone's house and saw that. The owners sure dug them.

[The Dark Knight]

They make those "real dolls" now.
Just like real chicks, make noise and everything.
Saw it on HBO (not that sex shop you didn't see me coming out of the other day)
Real hair & other real, jiggly parts and such. I'd find it for you, but I can't post it here. I'd get into trouble. Jared would freak out on me.



Yeah, I saw that episode.

And then I looked up the dolls out of curiosity.

I think they were something like 5 grand or more.

I think I'll just stick with using my imagination.

It hasn't let me down yet and it's free.

[Eldritch]

It hasn't let me down yet and it's free.


Just put in "Our Mrs. Reynolds."

'Nuff said.




Oh, except for "I'll be in my bunk."

[LordTrychon]

Screw all that!


What I want to hear from my guy.

1. The game's on.
2. I did the dishes
3. Pizza's on it's way.
4. The booze is cold


OH! And "honey, my shlong grew like 6 more inches last night & I somehow know what a g spot is"

That's it. I'm easy to please.
Can I substitute "I took out the trash" for "I did the dishes?" :ugh:

[Jared]

I'm pretty sure its accurated men in general don't take good care of themselves including married men. Btw I don't fall in that category I've family to think about so I want do my best to stay healthy.

I take better care of myself than my doctor wife does for herself.


She won't see a doctor for anything, because she feels it is embarrassing that she doesn't know what ails her. Even though she is forensic pathologist, not a clinical physician.


So, I am not sure what the stereotype is, just make sure you you don't include me in it.

[Jared]

Screw all that!


What I want to hear from my guy.

1. The game's on.
2. I did the dishes
3. Pizza's on it's way.
4. The booze is cold


OH! And "honey, my shlong grew like 6 more inches last night & I somehow know what a g spot is"

That's it. I'm easy to please.


1-4 I can handle. Number 6, no problem.


number 5 though....well, that would be magic....so, I think you're out of luck there.

[Fred the Bunny]

Ok, size really doesn't matter.
Unless it looks like a pen cap or something.

Then I guess we could go and get plastic surgery.
***We have the technology, we can rebuild him***

***Robot noises***

"Look out!, It's ROBOC*CK!"

In all seriousness, I think that women are too hard on a man to please them. If you do the same things you did in the beginning of the relationship, then you should be fine. Nobody likes the old bait n' switch. This goes for women too.

[Fred the Bunny]

Or NOT :coffee:

[LordTrychon]

Or NOT :coffee:
You never answered my question... Can I take out the trash instead of doing the dishes?

[Fred the Bunny]

You never answered my question... Can I take out the trash instead of doing the dishes?

I hate dishes.
You do em. I put out. That's good enough.

[LordTrychon]

I hate dishes.
You do em. I put out. That's good enough.
You have a dishwasher?

[Fred the Bunny]

You have a dishwasher?

Yes....YOU

[LordTrychon]

Yes....YOU
Paper plates it is.

[WhoDeyBengals]

Paper plates it is.
You lose at life, man.

[Fred the Bunny]

Paper plates it is.


Nononono :nono:

March your ass back in there and do them dishes.

[LordTrychon]

You lose at life, man.
I loved that game!

I get the blue car!

[WhoDeyBengals]

I loved that game!

I get the blue car!
Edited original post... but here it is again. :D

[LordTrychon]

Nononono :nono:

March your ass back in there and do them dishes.
I'll be the one sleeping on the couch.

[Fred the Bunny]

I'll be the one sleeping on the couch.


You call it sleeping....I call it choking on a sponge with some dish liquid in a very hurtful place.


Sleeping on the couch....yeh right.

[LordTrychon]

You call it sleeping....I call it choking on a sponge with some dish liquid in a very hurtful place.


Sleeping on the couch....yeh right.
T-Man!


Time to learn a new game!


Take this sponge and soap....

[Fred the Bunny]

T-Man!


Time to learn a new game!


Take this sponge and soap....


He knows that game and says "No way man, dishwasher's right over there" as he points to the kitchen. He knows better.

He'd use those things like they were clay pigeons.

[LordTrychon]

He knows that game and says "No way man, dishwasher's right over there" as he points to the kitchen. He knows better.

He'd use those things like they were clay pigeons.
So you DO have a dishwasher. :beer:

[Fred the Bunny]

So you DO have a dishwasher. :beer:
Yes, of course. :beer:

[LordTrychon]

Yes, of course. :beer:
Then I'll do the dishes.

I just don't do any scrubbing.



And here, I thought you wouldn't end up putting out over such a silly thing.

[Fred the Bunny]

Then I'll do the dishes.

I just don't do any scrubbing.



And here, I thought you wouldn't end up putting out over such a silly thing.


Ah ah ah....thou shall not count eggs before they hatch.

[LordTrychon]

Ah ah ah....thou shall not count eggs before they hatch.
Where's GEM?


She seems more low maintenance.

[Fred the Bunny]

Where's GEM?


She seems more low maintenance.

HEY LT? I was thinking about cutting my hair....what do ya think?

[LordTrychon]

HEY LT? I was thinking about cutting my hair....what do ya think?
Hahaha... nice.


I knew you swung that way... you always seemed darn near obsessed with her... and reacted way too much when she made her moves... ;)

[Fred the Bunny]

Hahaha... nice.


I knew you swung that way... you always seemed darn near obsessed with her... and reacted way too much when she made her moves... ;)


Ya know, if I had a stripper's pole and a little background music...I'd hook ya right up. Make ya feel right at home.

[LordTrychon]

Ya know, if I had a stripper's pole and a little background music...I'd hook ya right up. Make ya feel right at home.
Push me hard enough with all these jabs and I may develop mental instabilities.

[Fred the Bunny]

Push me hard enough with all these jabs and I may develop mental instabilities.


What is it about a greasy brass pole that makes a man turn to butter?

[WhoDeyBengals]

Push me hard enough with all these jabs and I may develop mental instabilities.
Waaay. Toooo. Eaaaasy.

[LordTrychon]

What is it about a greasy brass pole that makes a man turn to butter?
Usually, I think women concentrate on the pole more than men...


Except maybe Anton or Stretch.

[Fred the Bunny]

Usually, I think women concentrate on the pole more than men...


Except maybe Anton or Stretch.

That ALMOST sounded like a tiny bit of resentment.
Jealousy, perhaps?

[LordTrychon]

That ALMOST sounded like a tiny bit of resentment.
Jealousy, perhaps?
No... perhaps you missed the meaning. Need help?

[Fred the Bunny]

No... perhaps you missed the meaning. Need help?

No, honey. I can pick up on subtle jokes.
Or in your case, gay bashing towards Anton and cheap shots at my old man.


ROFLMAO, BTW

[LordTrychon]

No, honey. I can pick up on subtle jokes.
Or in your case, gay bashing towards Anton and cheap shots at my old man.


ROFLMAO, BTW
Ok... see... I even tried to keep it subtle enough that it would be a private joke....

[CinnaMunMun]

http://e-thug.net/

This is what all women wish their significant other did for them :laugh:

[Fred the Bunny]

Ok... see... I even tried to keep it subtle enough that it would be a private joke....


Private SHOT, you mean.

At least I'm voluntarily on hiatas.

[Fred the Bunny]

http://e-thug.net/

This is what all women wish their significant other did for them :laugh:

OMG

That made me laugh so hard that I had to go to the bathroom b-4 I peed on myself!

That fits PERFECTLY with the jacking of this thread in some morbid, sick way.
HEY LT!!!! You think if we played that for her she'd dance to it for ya?

[LordTrychon]

Private SHOT, you mean.

At least I'm voluntarily on hiatas.
Until the next time you're not looking.




Sorry! The administrator has specified that users can only post one message every 30 seconds.

[LordTrychon]

OMG

That made me laugh so hard that I had to go to the bathroom b-4 I peed on myself!

That fits PERFECTLY with the jacking of this thread in some morbid, sick way.
HEY LT!!!! You think if we played that for her she'd dance to it for ya?
No speakers where I'm at. You know that... care to explain?

[Fred the Bunny]

No speakers where I'm at. You know that... care to explain?


No way to explain. Call me and I'll let you hear it.

[LordTrychon]

No way to explain. Call me and I'll let you hear it.
That said and done.


Yes, I imagine she would... she loves me.

[Jared]

http://e-thug.net/

This is what all women wish their significant other did for them :laugh:


Rollerskating and rollercoasters?

A weird cat/loaf of bread thing?


Ok, I really don't get it. I lke to think I am hip, but apparently, I am not.

[His Wife]

Rollerskating and rollercoasters?

A weird cat/loaf of bread thing?


Ok, I really don't get it. I lke to think I am hip, but apparently, I am not.


You are not alone

[Fred the Bunny]

That said and done.


Yes, I imagine she would... she loves me.

Have at it.

[TXBRONC]

Rollerskating and rollercoasters?

A weird cat/loaf of bread thing?


Ok, I really don't get it. I lke to think I am hip, but apparently, I am not.

You're not alone I don't get it either.

[Eldritch]

You're not alone I don't get it either.

Me neither. I didn't detect any ultra-spiffiness in the lyrics either.

[LordTrychon]

Have at it.
Eh... Rednecks... you know.

[TXBRONC]

Eh... Rednecks... you know.


LT what is going on between you and Bunny?

[Fred the Bunny]

Rollerskating and rollercoasters?

A weird cat/loaf of bread thing?


Ok, I really don't get it. I lke to think I am hip, but apparently, I am not.

It's that sweet little voice singing that song just makes it so cute...and the fact that it's posted here in this thread makes it funny.
Timing was perfect.

[Fred the Bunny]

LT what is going on between you and Bunny?

Absolutely NOTHING.

[Eldritch]

LT what is going on between you and Bunny?


Dishwashing.

Try to keep up...






:D

[Jared]

It's that sweet little voice singing that song just makes it so cute...and the fact that it's posted here in this thread makes it funny.
Timing was perfect.


*checks speakers*



I got no singing at all.



And my speakers are working.

[Fred the Bunny]

Eh... Rednecks... you know.

I'm done. You bore me.

[TXBRONC]

Dishwashing.

Try to keep up...






:D

I forgot this goes back about four pages.

[LordTrychon]

I'm done. You bore me.
I'm not the first.

Don't get what you want HOW you want it... decide you don't want it at all.

[Fred the Bunny]

I'm not the first.

Don't get what you want HOW you want it... decide you don't want it at all.

Damn straight. Why settle?