On-line dating....

[orang/blu in LA]

Have any of you, or anyone you know, done this? If you have, which sites did you like or did you hate? Any success stories or horror stories? I have a friend who's just embarking on this and i'd like to spare her as much agony as possible by asking around. She's beautiful and smart and is a GREAT girl, she's just not into the whole bar scene, so we're thinking the whole on-line dating thing might work....or is worth a shot.

By the way, if any of you are single in the LA area (or know someone who is), let me know! I couldn't think of anything better than hooking her up with a bronco fan - as lord knows i will NOT let her date a raider fan!

[orang/blu in LA]

LOL. If you can age about 15 years in the next two hours, i'll send you a plane ticket! I can actually post a pic of her, i think i have some on my computer at home. Unfortunately she is looking for someone slightly older....

[NOLABroncofan]

OBLA,

I tried this for a short period of time after my divorce papers were final. Not saying they don't work, but for me... it was unsuccessful. I don't recall the website I used, but if memory serves it was match.com

I went out on 3 different dates throughout the course of about a month with women in my local area. None of the dates were horrible, but truthfully, they just weren't my type. The beauty behind these dating sites is that you can get to know someone via Email & later phone ( if you are brave enough ) without ever having to face them. This gives you the opportunity to be open and honest and get to know the person prior to actually meeting them face to face. Unfortunately... taking the honesty approach has it's down side as well. The women I met seemed to be one way when conversing with them, but were completely different than they described themselves once I met them in person ( Not just physically.. but personality as well ).

IMHO, the best way to meet someone is through friends. You seem like you have your head screwed on right and obviously you are attractive enough to run with the popular crowd. Maybe your friend would be best served if you were to introduce her to a single friend of your Fiancee' ( someone he trusts ). This way, you could try the double dating thing for a bit. I imagine she'd be more comfortable on the ice breaker if she had you and the hubby to be along.

Then again... there's nothing wrong with taking a look at the dating sites to see if she finds someone interesting through the profiles.

Anyway... just my $.02

Nuff said...

[orang/blu in LA]

NOLA - thanks so much for your honest opinion! yes, i would LOVE to set her up with one my man's friends...i'm not sure it's an option anymore though. we did that once already, and it worked out fabulously until the guy had to move to DC. Now it's a bit awkward, as she wouldn't want to date one of his other friends (they're a tight group of guys, the one she dated knows the rest of them very well- and they still have a casual thread of a long distance thing going on). But yes, that is the ideal way.

Yeah, i think she went to match.com too. i had another friend who did that and said she got a lot of "bait-and-switchers" - where the pictures were like 10 years and 20 pounds old. Not too great. I agree, it is pretty cool that you can converse with them before meeting etc. It seems like a low pressure way to get to know someone - but you're right too, it also can be misleading. Hmm. Well, i think she's going to do it, so now i have to read all the profiles for her and make sure she doesn't end up in enemy territory (raider fans abound here).

westflbroncostud - i'm sure if she saw you she'd think "What cute jail bait he is!"

[Perry1977]

Okay let me see....

I have met a total of 5 girls from online adventuring. 4 of those were from dating services, 1 was from an online game. 3 of the 5 ended up being just one date/meeting, 1 ended up as a weekend fling (the one from the online game, incidentally), and 1 ended as a long term relationship.

Here is the best advice I have for her:

First, there are a lot of people turning to online dating as a way to meet prospective partners. It is beneficial because you know (or at least think you do) something about the person and know much of what you have in common before the first date. However, anyone can post anything out there that isn't true. It is very easy to use fake photos and descriptions online. Just make sure she is careful and if a first date takes place, make it in a very open, public place.

While many people are turning to the internet in hopes of finding a serious relationship with big possiblities, just as many, if not more, people are using the net for one-time anonymous sex meetings. She has to be careful of this as well.

This may sound a little strange, but if she is as attractive as she says she is, she may be much better off by not posting a picture of herself in her ad. She needn't be worried about 'not getting any responses'. The girl I ended up dating had a picture posted, and she got literally hundreds or replies from guys all over the place, of all ages. I was completely amazed by how many responses she got. And these were guys from all over the spectrum. Old, young, married, divorced, single, etc etc etc. Of course, most of them she just deleted, but there will be no shortage of responses.

If she really wants a good guy, I would suggest that she do a little searching and contacting herself. If a guy actually posts a real picture and description of himself and his traits, chances are it is legitimate, and they are the guys really looking for a good relationship. Most guys who are looking to cheat on their wives or girlfriends are not dumb enough to post a public profile of themselves in the city they live in. There are a lot of really good guys out there who simply don't meet a lot of quality women. The bar scene works (or in this case, doesn't work) both ways.

It may not seem very lady like for her to contact a guy over the 'net instead of letting them come to her, but in this case it very well may be the wisest thing she can do. It should weed out a lot of the bad apples who just send messages to all the hot girls on the boards hoping for one of them to bite. This way she can get to know the guy a little better, via emails or message sessions or whatever, and then when she feels comfortable enough with him can send a picture. Of course, he at this point will be like "Thank you God, thank you!", and what you now have is two people meeting up who both have very high spirits and eagerness to have a good relationship.

I know the reason I have tried online dating is because I am a shy guy. I simply couldn't pick up a chick at a bar with a forklift (Okay, maybe there have been 1 or 2 rare cases but you get my drift). So far, not so great, I guess. It seems like when I leisurely date a girl, she wants to get married after a couple months; which sends me running to the hills faster than a 3-legged chicken at a barbecue. Put the meathooks down, honey!

Anyways, just make sure she is safe. Nothing brings out the whack jobs like the anonimity of the internet. This can be the best, or the worst, thing she has ever done.

[orang/blu in LA]

Perry - thanks!!! that's some great advice and words of wisdom. yeah, i worry about the safety issue as well. Maybe i should have her meet (don't you love how I'M dictating the date here) whatever guy it is at the bar near my house (which she loves), and then perhaps my boyfriend and i will just HAPPEN to be across the room or in screaming distance. haha. And not posting a pic might be a good idea too. I think i'll suggest that to her. Actually, i'm just going to have her read this whole thread. You all have said some great things. Thank you!

Man oh man, why aren't some of YOU guys out here? i'd set you up in a heartbeat!

[Perry1977]

Heh, thanks, you are too kind. I am giving these southern belles a try for a while. =p Now if I could just get one to go out with me...

[BlueDamsel]

I have a few stories I could tell...But I will save those for IM? that okay?

[dandaman23]

My uncle met this girl online, and they got married and were married for like a year, and then she used his credit card a lot..And spent a lot of his money, and then just left without telling anyone...She maxed out 2 of his credit cards, and stole a bunch of his money...I dont know why he didnt like sue her or even tell the cops...

[Elway4King]

I met a girl on-line at Hotmodelblubber.com. Her picture was hot but when she showed up she had a hair-lip, cleft pallet, smelled like wet garbage, had one big shoe, and was missing her right hand. I was curious how she typed so fast to say the least. She was a pretty unselfish lover though. I had to dump her the next morning because she let the eggs stick to the bottom of the pan. She said it was because she only had one hand but I think she was just lazy.

I'll never do that again!

Cody

[Javalon]

Re: On-line dating....

Originally posted by orang/blu in LA
Have any of you, or anyone you know, done this? If you have, which sites did you like or did you hate? Any success stories or horror stories? I have a friend who's just embarking on this and i'd like to spare her as much agony as possible by asking around. She's beautiful and smart and is a GREAT girl, she's just not into the whole bar scene, so we're thinking the whole on-line dating thing might work....or is worth a shot.

By the way, if any of you are single in the LA area (or know someone who is), let me know! I couldn't think of anything better than hooking her up with a bronco fan - as lord knows i will NOT let her date a raider fan!

Orang/blu in LA, you can drop the charade. I'll go out with you.

Well, I haven't personally done the online dating thing since I got hitched right before the internet boom. But my mother-in-law actually met a guy who might as well be my father-in-law now. They have not married yet for financial reasons but they seem to be soulmates going on about 5 years now. They're so compatible it's almost scary.

I'm afraid I don't have any advice but I just wanted to let you know it actually can work, and quite well at that. I've heard some bad stories but there seem to be as many good ones just to keep things balanced.

[GoDenver]

wow! the honesty and sincerety (<- if thats how you spell it) on this entire thread is so overwhelming, its kinda eerie.
i could show your friend a good ass time, plain and simple and yes, im in the area. she's gotta have a really, really nice ass, into really fast Harley's and...... thats pretty much it. oh ya, gotta be over 25. send her on a date with and she'll start calling you cupid.

[GoDenver]

Originally posted by GoDenver
.....on a date with and she'll start calling you cupid.

date with? that was supposed to say, "with me." ah ha ha, if that aint a sign, i dont know what is.... hahahaha

[orang/blu in LA]

Blue - yeah, IM me! I'd love to hear your stories.

Go - I actually DID think of you right away, but i think she's looking for more than a one-night-then-out-before-the-sun-comes-up kinda thing. If she tells me otherwise, i will certainly get you guys in contact.

All stories (even Dan's, LOL) are good for her to read. You're right Javalon, there seems to be a balance in stories, which is good. I just found out too that my brother actually met his girlfriend that way, on line, and she seems pretty normal (don't know about him- kidding, he's a great guy)...so there's some hope as well. Cody, your post will just crack her up - nice detail with the eggs.

[horsesense]

LA, may I suggest your friend post a pic. of someone not to appealing, this will prevent her from dating someone whos only intrest is "getting some". Then when the guy does meet her he'll be more then happily surprised at her appearance (especially if her looks are anywhere near the same league as yours)