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  • Those School Reunions

    I am about to attend our high school reunion. This one covers 50 years of history, and sad to say, I attended in the earlier years.

    Fortunately, my group of best buds was pretty much intact when we were in high school. Most of us went to this school, and therefore we have company at the event this weekend. It might be a little more awkward to show up on your own. One worries that others won't recognize you. After all, we have changed. Some not so much, but most have. We witnessed that at our 25th anniversary, as some people just didn't look the same. Now add 25 years to the mix.

    I think many of us are self-conscious that way. We want to look and feel young(er). In most cases it's no one's fault that we age more than others. Often it's hereditary. Sure, some lead faster, less healthy lives, but it does not always explain the transformation.

    But truthfully, many of us have changed much more so, in personality and confidence and even in terms of achievement. As is often the case, high school had its share of jocks and good-looking folks, who got way too much attention! But move the clock ahead, to now, and I have a strong belief that the nerds ended up more successful, and many of the less prominent people ended up being the true stars. It's often about insecurities of teenage years, and about the way we grow and develop into adults. And sometimes the ones who were hidden from the view, used their teenage years as a stepping stone to better things.

    I was somewhere in the middle back then, based on my interpretation, but I was certainly a little weak in confidence. It impacted my performance, and my social life. It prevented me from joining school activities, including some sports. But as the years progressed, from University to the career world, I did transform from my sensitivities. I became a social person. I had a reasonably successful management career. I became a decent public speaker. I had a number of sports achievements. And luckily for me, I ended up with amazing family and friends! (Sorry...I am not boasting, but trying to relate my own journey, as it relates to confidence and other similar characteristics, and that there is hope for folks who have some issues along the way).

    And this is not to begrudge anyone, but I don't think high school days represent who we end up being. As I reminisce, I wish I had done things differently, and had more belief in myself. BUT, in the end, like many others, I grew from those days.

    I guess it matters not that there was some of that "we/they" mentality back in our school days. I don't like it when I recall how some kids got the short end of the stick. But at the same time, it really doesn't amount to a whole lot, if the "they's" progressed past the "we's". It's so interesting, because many of the quieter ones ended up being the leaders.

    One last thought.....I wonder what some of those pretty girls back then are thinking about some of us guys now!!! "Hmmmm...maybe I should have given that guy a chance."

    Maybe not.....


  • #2
    What a thought!

    Can, I've never been interested in my reunions. Granted, I'm class if 1997, so there hasn't been as many chances to go. Here are my thoughts;

    I didn't stay in touch with most of the kids I went to school with. The few I did are still my friends. I also didn't hang out with a lot of them. So, why would I hang out with them now??

    My other thought is a lot more.... well... we remember these kids as they were.. kids. Becuase that's what we were in High School. So it's always felt pedophilic to me to sit and think, as a 34 year old, grown man- "Oh.. I can go see Marissa, the chick that was the hot chick in High School!!" That memory of her was as a child, even if she was 17. It just feels.. well... dirty. Granted, Marissa and stayed in touch and she's just as beautiful in her adult form... but it still feels dirty. (Oh, and names were changed to protect the innocent.)

    Anywho... maybe some thought shouldn't be voiced? Yeah, well, I'm the one who will voice them.
    *2011 BCMB Locker Room Division I League Champion*
    *Voted; 2013 & 2015 BCMBA's Scariest Mod*
    *Voted; 2014 BCMBA's Best Avi and Most Friendly*


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    • #3
      Originally posted by CanDB View Post
      I am about to attend our high school reunion. This one covers 50 years of history, and sad to say, I attended in the earlier years.

      Fortunately, my group of best buds was pretty much intact when we were in high school. Most of us went to this school, and therefore we have company at the event this weekend. It might be a little more awkward to show up on your own. One worries that others won't recognize you. After all, we have changed. Some not so much, but most have. We witnessed that at our 25th anniversary, as some people just didn't look the same. Now add 25 years to the mix.

      I think many of us are self-conscious that way. We want to look and feel young(er). In most cases it's no one's fault that we age more than others. Often it's hereditary. Sure, some lead faster, less healthy lives, but it does not always explain the transformation.

      But truthfully, many of us have changed much more so, in personality and confidence and even in terms of achievement. As is often the case, high school had its share of jocks and good-looking folks, who got way too much attention! But move the clock ahead, to now, and I have a strong belief that the nerds ended up more successful, and many of the less prominent people ended up being the true stars. It's often about insecurities of teenage years, and about the way we grow and develop into adults. And sometimes the ones who were hidden from the view, used their teenage years as a stepping stone to better things.

      I was somewhere in the middle back then, based on my interpretation, but I was certainly a little weak in confidence. It impacted my performance, and my social life. It prevented me from joining school activities, including some sports. But as the years progressed, from University to the career world, I did transform from my sensitivities. I became a social person. I had a reasonably successful management career. I became a decent public speaker. I had a number of sports achievements. And luckily for me, I ended up with amazing family and friends! (Sorry...I am not boasting, but trying to relate my own journey, as it relates to confidence and other similar characteristics, and that there is hope for folks who have some issues along the way).

      And this is not to begrudge anyone, but I don't think high school days represent who we end up being. As I reminisce, I wish I had done things differently, and had more belief in myself. BUT, in the end, like many others, I grew from those days.

      I guess it matters not that there was some of that "we/they" mentality back in our school days. I don't like it when I recall how some kids got the short end of the stick. But at the same time, it really doesn't amount to a whole lot, if the "they's" progressed past the "we's". It's so interesting, because many of the quieter ones ended up being the leaders.

      One last thought.....I wonder what some of those pretty girls back then are thinking about some of us guys now!!! "Hmmmm...maybe I should have given that guy a chance."

      Maybe not.....

      Wow....well said. And insightful.

      Confidence....who really had it back then? And why would one?
      That old saw..."If I knew then what I know now"! How true.

      Comment


      • #4
        Wow have fun! I've only had one reunion so far and I went... The best part was getting to see that all the mean girls had gotten fat but we all still stayed in our cliques so it was just like being back in high school, we definitely hadn't matured yet... Maybe the 20th will be different

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by KatieElway7 View Post
          Wow have fun! I've only had one reunion so far and I went... The best part was getting to see that all the mean girls had gotten fat but we all still stayed in our cliques so it was just like being back in high school, we definitely hadn't matured yet... Maybe the 20th will be different
          Hey...l do I know you?!?!?
          *2011 BCMB Locker Room Division I League Champion*
          *Voted; 2013 & 2015 BCMBA's Scariest Mod*
          *Voted; 2014 BCMBA's Best Avi and Most Friendly*


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          • #6
            Originally posted by ebsoria View Post
            What a thought!

            Can, I've never been interested in my reunions. Granted, I'm class if 1997, so there hasn't been as many chances to go. Here are my thoughts;

            I didn't stay in touch with most of the kids I went to school with. The few I did are still my friends. I also didn't hang out with a lot of them. So, why would I hang out with them now??

            My other thought is a lot more.... well... we remember these kids as they were.. kids. Becuase that's what we were in High School. So it's always felt pedophilic to me to sit and think, as a 34 year old, grown man- "Oh.. I can go see Marissa, the chick that was the hot chick in High School!!" That memory of her was as a child, even if she was 17. It just feels.. well... dirty. Granted, Marissa and stayed in touch and she's just as beautiful in her adult form... but it still feels dirty. (Oh, and names were changed to protect the innocent.)

            Anywho... maybe some thought shouldn't be voiced? Yeah, well, I'm the one who will voice them.
            eb....are you saying I'm a dirty old man, but in a futuristic sense?? This is like a sci-fi movie....Looking to the future (which is now) but thinking about teenage girls in the eyes of the teenager I was.



            Well......should be fun seeing one or two of my old girlfriends......and unfortunately the key word is "old"!

            Just a little joke folks. It will be fun to say hello to a number of people in attendance!

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by KatieElway7 View Post
              Wow have fun! I've only had one reunion so far and I went... The best part was getting to see that all the mean girls had gotten fat but we all still stayed in our cliques so it was just like being back in high school, we definitely hadn't matured yet... Maybe the 20th will be different
              A Katie sighting!!!!

              :thumb:

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by CanDB View Post
                eb....are you saying I'm a dirty old man, but in a futuristic sense?? This is like a sci-fi movie....Looking to the future (which is now) but thinking about teenage girls in the eyes of the teenager I was.



                Well......should be fun seeing one or two of my old girlfriends......and unfortunately the key word is "old"!

                Just a little joke folks. It will be fun to say hello to a number of people in attendance!
                Well, Can... change the wheels on the walker and lube the bearings. Go have a blast and knock back 12 ounces of Ensure for me!!!

                *2011 BCMB Locker Room Division I League Champion*
                *Voted; 2013 & 2015 BCMBA's Scariest Mod*
                *Voted; 2014 BCMBA's Best Avi and Most Friendly*


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                • #9
                  Originally posted by Mr Bojangles View Post
                  Wow....well said. And insightful.

                  Confidence....who really had it back then? And why would one?
                  That old saw..."If I knew then what I know now"! How true.
                  Thx Mr B! I know, unless you know someone really well, who really knows what others are feeling inside??

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    I hope you enjoy yourself at your reunion, Can! I have missed both my tenth, and more recently my twentieth. I did get a little laugh though right before my twentieth when I spoke to my best friend from high school and she said, "well if you're not going, then I'm definitely not going." Haha, felt like high school all over again. I do plan on going to the next one though.

                    I know the one jock I always liked through high school went on to be very successful after….

                    For the most part though, I don't miss it…just miss a few friends from back then;-)
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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Sophia23 View Post
                      I hope you enjoy yourself at your reunion, Can! I have missed both my tenth, and more recently my twentieth. I did get a little laugh though right before my twentieth when I spoke to my best friend from high school and she said, "well if you're not going, then I'm definitely not going." Haha, felt like high school all over again. I do plan on going to the next one though.

                      I know the one jock I always liked through high school went on to be very successful after….

                      For the most part though, I don't miss it…just miss a few friends from back then;-)
                      Shucks....you proved me wrong!! Seriously, of course some of the jocks and some of the pretty folks were successful. But I have a hunch the nerds did the most damage in the business world!

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                      • #12
                        They can't find me.

                        Have fun, Can!
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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by Peanut View Post
                          They can't find me.

                          Have fun, Can!
                          After last night's reception and today's breakfast/open house, I can say that we had a good time meeting up with a number of folks. Many stories were told, and a whole lot of goodwill exchanged. It was worth attending for sure.

                          I am fortunate, because some of my best buds attended high school with me, therefore we attended the activities intact, and not too worried about how things would unravel, all the while knowing we had a bit of a group safety net... which is much easier than feeling the discomfort of walking into the school functions alone.

                          We were in a good place back then, but not in the inner high school sanctum, if such a thing really exists. We were just fine, and waiting for the best years to come. But as I observed our interactions this weekend I was reminded of something I was quite proud of. That my group was not selective as to who we would talk to, and how we were perceived. If someone wanted to spend some time with us, we would share out time quite willingly, no matter what end of the social spectrum they were "defined" to be. If anything, the ones with the egos were welcome, but not appreciated as much.

                          Therefore I definitely came away satisfied this weekend, proud of "my buds", and happy to meet up with many nice folks from the past.

                          ~~~~~~

                          Just thought of one more thing......sometimes when I go to events like this, if I know they might attend, I target certain folks who I have wanted to say something positive to, based on some unfinished business from the past. I was very lucky this weekend, as I did get to gain that type of closure with two people from my days of youth. The time was right for both interactions, and I could not have been more pleased with their reaction to my words. If not for the event I may never have had the opportunity again.

                          Now I can move forward, knowing our relationships are sealed with happy endings, if I never see them again.
                          Last edited by CanDB; 05-03-2014, 08:22 PM.

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                          • #14
                            Glad you had a good time, Can!!!
                            *2011 BCMB Locker Room Division I League Champion*
                            *Voted; 2013 & 2015 BCMBA's Scariest Mod*
                            *Voted; 2014 BCMBA's Best Avi and Most Friendly*


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                            • #15
                              Originally posted by ebsoria View Post
                              Glad you had a good time, Can!!!
                              Thx eb.....had a good time, and further, put a number of things in perspective, which is worth so much more.

                              Oh yes, talk about nostalgia. I noticed that my friend's old house was being used as a display suite for a new condo development in a nearby area. He lived there until he got married, which was about 40 years ago, and then his parents sold it (can't remember when). So he decided to check out the house / display suite for memory sake. He asked if he could see the basement, but the agent wasn't really sure. So my buddy peaked around, and walked down to the basement. He said suddenly all the memories came back, as the basement (rec room) looked almost exactly the same. So he just spent portions of 2 days with folks we went to school with over 40 years ago, and then he visited the home he grew up in.

                              Lots of reminiscing!!
                              Last edited by CanDB; 05-05-2014, 10:53 AM.

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