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  • zero1307
    replied
    Originally posted by JWinn
    Beats me by 30 seconds, plus delivery time.

    I've seen strippers though, just never been to a club. Just never saw a reason to overpay for alcohol and stare at women I cant have.
    Thats what I say but my friends think I am stupid... I tell them I have a girlfriend, I'll just make her dance...

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  • zero1307
    replied
    Originally posted by JWinn
    Here's something you never knew BBJ......

    In the twenty and a half years that I have been eligible, or legal, I have never once been to a strip bar or club!!

    That makes two of us, but I have only been allowed to for 4 years. I was in one once to deliever a pizza. I guess stripers have to eat to right? I walked in, handed the pizza to bar tender, looked at the stage for 30 seconds and turned arounded and walked out... Does that count?

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  • BVP
    replied
    Originally posted by DBfan4lyfe
    I'm a Bronco fan...
    Surprising.

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  • ReleaseTheBeast7
    replied
    I'm a Bronco fan...

    Leave a comment:


  • BVP
    replied
    Originally posted by West
    Rave Motion Pictures
    Oh, I dont know where that is. I go to the Westminister Promenade.

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  • urinal_cake
    replied
    Originally posted by ATL5515
    i play any where up front
    do you play?
    Used to in high school, I played right/left wing...™

    Leave a comment:


  • ATL5515
    replied
    Originally posted by urinal_cake
    Cool, what position do you play?™

    BTW, for those that don't know, I'm a bigger hockey fan than football fan...™
    i play any where up front
    do you play?

    Leave a comment:


  • West
    replied
    Originally posted by BVP
    What movie theatre do you go to?

    I play Football and Basketball.
    Rave Motion Pictures

    Leave a comment:


  • BVP
    replied
    Originally posted by West
    I have a life outside of this board (hard to believe right?)

    I make time for several things...those are:

    Track- Monday-Thursday 2:30-4:30
    Friends- i go to my buddies house every weekend
    Girls- i go to the movies and a hang out afterwards every friday
    Family- i go to the gym Monday, Wednesday and Friday each week with my dad 5 pm-6:30 pm
    What movie theatre do you go to?

    I play Football and Basketball.

    Leave a comment:


  • PAINTERDAVE
    replied
    Pal and Barky...part 3

    The next day dragged on and on, Pal told me. 5:00PM could not get there quick enough. Pal had a new plan. He had reconoitered. After 5:00PM, Dogcatcher Joe went home to the little woman. The pound was left in the hands of a local High School boy, who was damn glad to have the job of cleaning and locking up at 6:00PM. 5:15PM arrived.

    Pal, knowing everyone in town, wanted to utter not a word, or show a bit of skin, so he could not be identified. He approached the Dog Pound bundled up, with his ski gloves on. Perched on his head, was a knit ski mask, rolled up like a hat, but ready to be rolled down right quick. In his hand, he carried a brown paper grocery bag. Once upon the scene, he rolled down the hat into a mask, now he only had a triangle for a nose. He approached the counter, the youngster dropped his mop and stepped up to the plate.
    "Can I help you sir?" The puzzled boy asked the masked man?
    Pal had a note prepared, stuffed in his back pocket. As he struggled to pull it out, his ski gloves thwarted him.
    "Do you want to buy a dog, sir?" asked the boy?
    Still struggling, Pal grunted assent.
    A wave of relief passed over the boys brow.
    "Mr. These here dogs aint for sale! They belong to people. They been caught. Once them folks pay their fines, these dogs are going home!" That boy felt right pleased with himself. He had handled that situation just fine.
    Suddenly, Pal got to the note. He pushed it forward, and grunted "Read it!"

    The note said:
    Do as you are told, and you won't be harmed. Take this bag. Go to that empty, back cage. Turn over that 5 gallon bucket. Sit on it. Place the bag over your head.
    Stay put.

    Pal told me the kid's eyes grew wide. He reached out and took the brown paper bag. He went to the back, sat on the bucket. Pal said when the kid gripped one side of the folded bag and then popped it in the air to open it, why Pal started to giggle. As the kid slid the bag over his head, Pal busted out laughing, he said.

    Pal ran down the row of cages, and he opened every last one of 'em. Once all them critters were freed, Pal and Barky bolted outthe front of the Pound, and raced down the street. Damndest thing, Pal told me. All them dogs acted like he was their saviour. He told me he felt like the pied piper, running down the street with his pack of dogs! He and Barky got home, locked 'em all out, and they yipped and kyi-yi-yied for a while. Pal grabbed some hot dogs, bolted out the back, led the pack away and threw the bribe. It worked.

    My buddy Pal, is a true American charactor.

    I am a better man for knowing him.

    I hope he is not upset for me telling this tale.

    Oh, that is right! It is all fiction. There is no Pal or Barky.
    Disregard it all. What a friggin'imagination Old PAINTER has!

    Leave a comment:


  • PAINTERDAVE
    replied
    Barky and Pal...cont.

    Well, Pal and Barky had run right through all their damn warnings and a few more threats besides.

    "If I see that beast on these city streets without restraint again, it is straight to the lockup he'll go!" declared Dogcatcher Joe.

    "My Ass" Pal muttered under his breath.

    As soon as the next day, Pal was out roaming with Barky. Being the smartass he was, Pal had a lead of fishing line tied to Barky's collar and running to his own pocket. That Pal, he was baiting old Joe sure as all get out. And it din't take long, neither!

    Joe screeched up, all official with his vehicle and his uniform and his cocky attitude.
    And Pal got what he deserved. After what was later described as an "altercation" Barky got a ride in the paddy wagon to dog jail. Local residents, hardcore good old boys of a hardcore old mining community, they said they learned new cusswords that day. Pal was fit to be tied.

    That night, was the broadcast premier of Halloween. After watching it, Pal drug his friend with him, intent on Barky's freedom. As those two sat in the cab of an old Chevy, surveying the landscape, Pal told me that his cohort jumped at every stray cat, shadow, or chipmunk that moved an inch. It became obvious, Pal had enlisted the wrong man for the job. With a bad taste in his mouth, Pal threw in the towel. After he dropped off his cohort, he quickly parked his truck around the corner. He silently snaked his way to the back of his bud's house, and waited for bud to appear at the kitchen window. Once he did, Pal turned on the flashlight under his chin and got close to the window, rapping on it sharply! His bud jumped near out of his skin. Pal laughed all the way home.

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  • PAINTERDAVE
    replied
    hey

    So,

    Here's a true story.

    I waren't me, and damn skippy I be changing his name.

    My Pal, we'll just call him Pal, well, Pal lived in a small town.
    Pal had a great dog, a mighty, mighty dog. Half Wolf, half German Shepard.
    Let's call the dog Barky.

    Well, Pal never once tied Barky up, since he was a pup. Pal done brought Barky every single place he ever went for the first year, easy. Pal made it out like a Good God damned Soap Opera the first day he did leave that critter at home. You'da thought that canine was a damn human, the way Pal carried on. Come to think of it, that critter ACTED downright human. He had more personality than half the girls I went to High School with, and he minded better than most. Barky was polite, and never destroyed a single thing. Any where, you tell that critter to go to the door, he'd lay by the front door until you'd release him. Barky never got underfoot, and he'd fetch any item you told him to. In a way, it seems Old Barky missed his calling, he coulda been a Hollywood star, but just knowing him, you knew he woulda shunned the bright lights. Pal brought him with us everywhere, everytime, and Barky was like one of the boys.

    Pal had a major rager one night, the people and the music and the noise were all too much for Barky. That critter turned his back on all us drunks, and after crossing a highway, Colorado Blvd., and Colfax Ave, Barky bedded down at Pal's parents house - 22 miles away! Too much noise!

    I watched Barky for a week, once, when Pal was in Cal. After 4 days, Barky and my Old English got into it, but good. They both reared up on they hindquarters and were like 2 boxing, biting, growling wildebeasts! Barky spent the rest of his vacation in the garage of Pal's Ma and Pa. Pal's Pa, he had no patience for critters, or the rest of us, come to think of it.

    Well, Pal never once tied Barky up. It turns out, Pal got into a feud with the dogcatcher in his small mountain town. Well, I don't guess there is one individual in these United States with more stubborness than Pal. Right close to him, it seems, was this small town dogcatcher!

    Leave a comment:


  • PAINTERDAVE
    replied
    hey

    Sorry! I ran up against a wall! I done told it all!

    Well, I've tried to see your side,
    Have you ever looked at mine?
    You think things are different,
    but theyr'e not.
    I have told you every story of my life a thousand times!
    I guess you'd like to hear a different tune!

    I turned my cheek when,
    You hit me close to home.
    Just 'cause I'm proud,
    Don't mean a thing.
    We've made it this far,
    It's too late to turn back now.
    I'm gonna let you walk on out that door.

    Well, there's no doubt about it,
    I think our love has faded,
    There's dark clouds gathering overhead.
    No doubt about,
    You can't see one thing my way,
    You 'oughta try it your way instead!

    So, Goodbye, Maria!
    May the years be good to you!
    We'll both do better,
    after awhile.
    You go your way honey,
    and I'll go mine, we'll both do better,
    down the line!


    So, then good bye Bad Luck and hard times,
    Go find another guy!
    'Cause this one is walkin down the line!

    Deadly Earnest and the ****** Tonk Heroes.

    Leave a comment:


  • zero1307
    replied
    By the way... I did quit that stuff! I'm not that stupid to still do it.

    Leave a comment:


  • zero1307
    replied
    I once took far too much LSD and lost my mind. For 3 hours I sat indian style, rocked back and forth, and mumbled a language that no one around me could understand. I think I was speaking multiple sentances at once. I thought everyone around me was dieing including myself. I advice anyone thinking of taking acid, to think twice. It's dangerous stuff! Stay away

    Leave a comment:

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