Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

The Guys' Rules

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • The Guys' Rules

    Idn't it the truth?


    The Guys' Rules

    At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down. Finally,
    the guys' side of the story. (I must admit, it's pretty good.)
    We always hear "the rules"
    From the female side.
    Now here are the rules from the male side.
    These are our rules!
    Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!

    1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.

    1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up,
    put it down.
    We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining
    about you leaving it down.

    1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the
    tides. Let it be.

    1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of
    It that way.

    1. Crying is blackmail.

    1. Ask for what you want.
    Let us be clear on this one:
    Subtle hints do not work!
    Strong hints do not work!
    Obvious hints do not work!
    Just say it!

    1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
    question.

    1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it!
    That's what we do.
    Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

    1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

    1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
    In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

    1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't
    expect us to act like soap opera guys.

    1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

    1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the
    ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

    1. You an either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it
    done. Not both.
    If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

    1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
    commercials.

    1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

    1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
    Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a
    fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

    1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.

    1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
    nothing's wrong.
    We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

    1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an
    answer you don't want to hear.

    1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...Really.

    1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared
    to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.

    1. You have enough clothes.

    1. You have too many shoes.

    1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

    1. Thank you for reading this.
    Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
    But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

    Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
    Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger
    laugh!

  • #2
    very good ,cp eta 56 seconds
    SPORT IS LIKE PHOTOGRAPHY,...IF YOU DONT FOCUS,YOU JUST GET NEGATIVES



    Born-1990
    Got ipod- 2004




    Oh! this one time i saw a blimp!

    Comment


    • #3
      Those are great... I think my favorite was number 1... but I'm not positive

      Comment


      • #4
        Those are good.
        Patriotic dissent is a luxury of those protected by better men than they.

        Comment


        • #5
          By far the best one is the toilet seat one. They really need to quit whining about the seat.

          Comment


          • #6
            An oldie, but a goodie
            The Whiskyteers ~ One for all, and all for MORE!!!!

            Broncomania Best Foreign Poster
            BFC.........D Will #27.............D Nash #29
            You'll Never Walk Alone




            Spiffing sig, MasterShake :cheers:

            You know, in certain older civilized cultures, when men failed as entirely as you have, they would throw themselves on their swords ~ The Operative, Serenity

            Maybe Slowick should pay attention

            Comment

            Working...
            X