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  • Butt Dust . . .

    No adult is this creative!!


    JACK (age 3) was watching his Mom breast-feeding his new baby
    sister. After a while he asked: "Mom, why have you got two? Is
    one for hot and one for cold milk?"

    MELANIE (age 5) asked her Granny how old she was. Granny
    replied she was so old she didn't remember any more. Melanie
    said, "If you don't remember you must look in the back of your
    panties. Mine say five to six."

    STEVEN (age 3) hugged and kissed his Mom goodnight. "I love
    you so much, that when you die I'm going to bury you outside
    my bedroom window,"

    BRITTANY (age 4) had an earache and wanted a painkiller. She
    tried in vain to take the lid off the bottle. Seeing her
    frustration, her Mom explained it was a childproof cap, and
    she'd have to open it for her. Eyes wide with wonder, the
    little girl asked: "How does it know it's me?"

    SUSAN (age 4) was drinking juice when she got the hiccups.
    "Please don't give me this juice again," she said, "it makes
    my teeth cough."

    D.I. (age 4) stepped onto the bathroom scale and asked: "How
    much do I cost?"

    MARC (age 4) was engrossed in a young couple that were hugging
    and kissing in a restaurant. Without taking his eyes off them,
    he asked his dad: "Why is he whispering in her mouth?"

    CLINTON (age 5) was in his bedroom looking worried. When his
    Mom asked what was troubling him, he replied, "I don't know
    what'll happen with this bed when I get married. How will my
    wife fit in?"

    JAMES (age 4) was listening to a Bible story. His dad read:
    "The man named Lot was warned to take his wife and flee out of
    the city but his wife looked back and was turned to salt."
    Concerned, James asked: "What happened to the flea?"

    TAMMY (age 4) was with her mother when they met an elderly,
    rather wrinkled woman her Mom knew. Tammy looked at her for a
    while and then asked, "Why doesn't your skin fit your face?"



    And the story of the day...

    The Sermon I think this Mom will never forget.. this particular
    Sunday sermon... "Dear Lord," the minister began, with arms
    extended toward heaven and a rapturous look on his upturned
    face. "Without you, we are but dust." He would have continued,
    but at that moment my very obedient daughter (who was listening!)
    leaned over to me and asked quite audibly in her shrill little
    girl voice, "Mom, what is butt dust?

    -----

  • #2
    Great find! That is entertaining!:thumb:
    My 5 year old daughter saw my friend breastfeeding her son and asked why the baby was eating her boob!
    I hope that didn't offend anyone.
    Last edited by Thundergirl; 11-28-2006, 06:19 PM.


    Comment


    • #3
      Those were some funny stories Top!
      Through a child's eyes....adults look
      and sound pretty silly sometimes.
      (You know what? We are sometimes too!)
      "War is an ugly thing, but not the ugliest of things. The decayed and degraded state of moral and patriotic feeling which thinks that nothing is worth war is much worse. The person who has nothing for which he is willing to fight, nothing which is more important than his own personal safety, is a miserable creature and has no chance of being free unless made and kept so by the exertions of better men than himself.

      John Stuart Mill (Look him up )

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by His Wife
        Those were some funny stories Top!
        Through a child's eyes....adults look
        and sound pretty silly sometimes.
        (You know what? We are sometimes too!)
        true.....very true...

        Thanks Top!!!
        Tony G


        The Chefs

        Comment


        • #5
          great post!

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by ThunderGirl
            Great find! That is entertaining!:thumb:
            My 5 year old daughter saw my friend breastfeeding her son and asked why the baby was eating her boob!
            I hope that didn't offend anyone.
            Offend? I just gave you a CP!

            -----

            Comment


            • #7
              I use to call preschool, precake and kindergarten candygarten.

              Ahhh the good ole days. Only makes me wonder what life would be like if I had a time traveling machine

              Comment


              • #8
                Thats pretty funny. I would give you a CP but I ran out...

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by xX-Bronco-Xx
                  I use to call preschool, precake and kindergarten candygarten.

                  Ahhh the good ole days. Only makes me wonder what life would be like if I had a time traveling machine
                  Well, I remember . . .

                  I was maybe about 7, when my 6-year-old best friend asked me, "Are you a
                  democrap or a repelican?" Guess he had heard his parents talking.

                  -----

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    These are great Top :clap: :clap:


                    Thanks to Bronco4Life and Medford Bronco for signature

                    Rest in Peace - Darrent (27) and Damien (29

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by topscribe
                      Well, I remember . . .

                      I was maybe about 7, when my 6-year-old best friend asked me, "Are you a
                      democrap or a repelican?" Guess he had heard his parents talking.

                      -----
                      Great post!

                      Democrap!

                      Repelican!
                      President of the GPA, Head of Mainland Europe Chapter




                      formerly Officially Adopted by saltybuggah
                      I adopted Skywalker

                      I have been adopted by Chris Wade

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Good stuff, top! Kids really do say the darndest things.

                        These remind me of something that happened recently.

                        A few days ago my 3 year old daughter had to go pee so I took her in to the bathroom to use her little potty. As she was sitting down she said, in a very matter-of-fact tone of voice,

                        "You know what, dad? When I'm a boy I'm going to pull out my little pee pee thing like this..." [as she goes through the motion] "...and then I can go potty standing up like you. That'll be pretty cool, huh dad?"

                        Me: "Uh..." :paper:
                        Winter is Coming!

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          More stuff from kids

                          HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHOM TO MARRY?
                          You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming.
                          -- Alan, age 10

                          No person really decides before they grow up who they're going to marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you're stuck with.
                          -- Kristen, age 10

                          WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED?
                          Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then.
                          -- Camille, age 10

                          HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?
                          You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids. -- Derrick, age 8

                          WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MOM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON?
                          Both don't want any more kids.
                          -- Lori, age 8

                          WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?
                          Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know each other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough.
                          -- Lynnette, age 8 (isn't she a treasure)

                          On the first date, they just tell each other lies and that Usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date.
                          -- Martin, age 10

                          WHAT WOULD YOU DO ON A FIRST DATE THAT WAS TURNING SOUR?
                          I'd run home and play dead. The next day I would call all the newspapers and make sure they wrote about me in all the dead columns.
                          -- Craig, age 9

                          WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?
                          When they're rich.
                          -- Pam, age 7 (smart girl)

                          The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn't want to mess with that.
                          - - Curt, age 7

                          The rule goes like this: If you kiss someone, then you should marry them and have kids with them. It's the right thing to do.
                          -- Howard, age 8

                          IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?
                          It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need someone to clean up after them.-- Anita, age 9 (bless you child)

                          HOW WOULD THE WORLD BE DIFFERENT IF PEOPLE DIDN'T GET MARRIED?
                          There sure would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn't there?
                          -- Kelvin, age 8

                          And the #1 Favorite is........
                          HOW WOULD YOU MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?
                          Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like a truck.
                          -- Ricky, age 10




                          Damn, some funny stuff there, my fav's in red
                          President of the GPA, Head of Mainland Europe Chapter




                          formerly Officially Adopted by saltybuggah
                          I adopted Skywalker

                          I have been adopted by Chris Wade

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Originally posted by Kapaibro
                            HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHOM TO MARRY?
                            You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming.
                            -- Alan, age 10

                            No person really decides before they grow up who they're going to marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you're stuck with.
                            -- Kristen, age 10

                            WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED?
                            Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then.
                            -- Camille, age 10

                            HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?
                            You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids. -- Derrick, age 8

                            WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MOM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON?
                            Both don't want any more kids.
                            -- Lori, age 8

                            WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?
                            Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know each other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough.
                            -- Lynnette, age 8 (isn't she a treasure)

                            On the first date, they just tell each other lies and that Usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date.
                            -- Martin, age 10

                            WHAT WOULD YOU DO ON A FIRST DATE THAT WAS TURNING SOUR?
                            I'd run home and play dead. The next day I would call all the newspapers and make sure they wrote about me in all the dead columns.
                            -- Craig, age 9

                            WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?
                            When they're rich.
                            -- Pam, age 7 (smart girl)

                            The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn't want to mess with that.
                            - - Curt, age 7

                            The rule goes like this: If you kiss someone, then you should marry them and have kids with them. It's the right thing to do.
                            -- Howard, age 8

                            IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?
                            It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need someone to clean up after them.-- Anita, age 9 (bless you child)

                            HOW WOULD THE WORLD BE DIFFERENT IF PEOPLE DIDN'T GET MARRIED?
                            There sure would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn't there?
                            -- Kelvin, age 8

                            And the #1 Favorite is........
                            HOW WOULD YOU MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?
                            Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like a truck.
                            -- Ricky, age 10




                            Damn, some funny stuff there, my fav's in red
                            Those were good Kap!


                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Thanks Kap!!



                              -----

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